The Voice of Anger
Anger is an emotion that is often misunderstood. When you ask women about anger, they usually associate it with losing control, causing destruction, or simply being “mean.” Many women try to avoid it at all costs, seeing it as negative energy that has no place in their lives. Yet anger is one of the most misunderstood emotions, because buried within it are answers to our needs, struggles, and sense of self. Most of us aren’t brave enough to approach anger with curiosity and understanding. And suppressing it doesn’t work—anger always finds a way out. The only way to manage it is by listening to it—and by that, I mean listening to yourself.
So, what is your anger telling you?
Ignored emotions: Anger often arises when other emotions—sadness, exhaustion, or overstimulation—have been ignored. In our hyperactive modern world, it’s easy to keep going without noticing that you have reached your limit. Anger is your alarm, signaling that you need to slow down and attend to your needs, not just the expectations of others.
Crossed boundaries: Anger emerges when your boundaries are violated. It tells you that someone is causing you pain or that resentment is building. In these moments, anger is protective—it is trying to make space for your wants, needs, and well-being.
Grief and loneliness: Anger can also surface during times of loss, grief, or isolation, helping you find your voice in a world that feels destabilized.
Anger has the power to destroy—but only if it is ignored. I challenge you to approach your anger with curiosity. Where is it coming from? What need is unmet? Which boundaries are being crossed? Embrace anger as a tool, not an enemy, and allow it to guide you toward a more balanced, authentic life.
Dr. Bhumi Mehta
Dr. Bhumi Mehta is a licensed clinical psychologist offering telehealth services in over 40 states. She found her passion for matrescence (aka the motherhood journey) after becoming a mother herself. To learn more please visit: www.hopefromtherapy.com
